is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
