hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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