He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
