How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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