You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
