so that wasnt chicken after all
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
