Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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