I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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