Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
