She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
