You're completely useless in the revolution.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
