i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
