Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
