Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
