I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
