I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
