i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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