I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
