i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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