We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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