Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
two words...techno handjob
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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