I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
