i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
