How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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