Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
