I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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