worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
