Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
