i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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