So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
