If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
