What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Someone came in the potted fern
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
