So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
