Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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