The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
