Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
This baby is an asshole
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
