your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
