i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
We don't watch enough power rangers
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
