I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
