I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
