i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
