you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I need to sanitize my soul.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
