i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
