we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
