i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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