He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
