He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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