Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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