you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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