only if we run a train.
done.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
