Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
